About Dr. Dar… What You Need To Know

Most people have challenges in their closest relationships,
even for kind, generous, and compassionate people

Dr. Dar The Relationship Healer

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Maybe it’s a difficult relationship. Or not knowing how to communicate how you’re feeling, especially when you’re not feeling good about something that was said or done.

Issues and stress at work, a spouse who just does not understand how you feel or appreciate what you do, having a hard time finding the right person to have a relationship with, not knowing how to say something to your loved ones without it exploding into an upsetting situation, self confidence or esteem issues, financial worries, and this isn’t even the full list.  D


So many people can’t figure out how to choose what brings them joy and ease, but are spectacular at bringing joy and ease to others.

It’s even harder to figure out how to eliminate stress, pressure, anxiety or struggles and create harmony in life when trying to figure it out alone.

For years I struggled…

Yes I was in your shoes

For years I struggled with not honoring myself or my choices. I felt obligated, like it was my duty, to do what my parents, boyfriend, or family members demanded.

All I wanted to do was create harmony with all the people putting pressure on me. I wanted to be what they wanted me to be and do what they wanted me to do in my personal and my professional life.  It’s what kept the peace around me… otherwise, it was tense… even toxic… and I was constantly walking on eggshells… not knowing when the next blow up or upset would be happening.

Eventually, this took a toll on my mental, physical, emotional and soul health…

Then I realized that I was giving everything and everyone power to define my life and work.


I had been laid off and was in a blame others and myself dark funk for almost a year.

You see, my whole identity was associated with the company I worked for so when I was no longer there, I had to figure out who I was all over again… and tied with my relationships… putting myself into their lives instead of maintaining my own.

I tried changing jobs, making new friends, letting go of the old, dating someone different, and even distancing myself from my family. Dr. Dar, Metaphysical Life Coach for People Pleasers

I still didn’t get it! 

When Things Finally Started to Change

It was only when I realized that everything and everyone in my life was responding to me, my energy, feelings, thoughts, and choices, and not the other way around.  I was showing them how to treat me, not the other way around.  My energy… thoughts, feelings, and actions were all giving them the message to take advantage of my generous, compassionate, kind, and collaborative nature.


I began learning about ‘the needs that drive my choices’.  It was hard at first to dig deep to find them… but once I did… my whole world… and relationships shifted for the better.

And they stayed that way!

That’s when I finally saw things … and the people around me… start to change.  Yes! I am living proof that you can change people contrary to what most people think.  


The Relationship Languages Emerged

The Feel Good Superpowers Emerged - Dr. Dar Hawks

Dr. Dar The Relationship Healer I had trained everyone in my life to expect me to be their end-all-be-all to whatever was going on… at work, in my relationships.  They mastered using guilt to manipulate me into saying yes… and feel terrible if I said no.

So… Dr. Dar The Relationship Healer

I would do everything I could to be a “contribution” to them and their lives.

It felt so good to be valued, recognized, and appreciated for being a giver and contributor to others.

(You’re feeling me here huh?)

I attracted people, experiences, and things into my life that supported my behavior and actions… that matched up to the energy I was holding… and emanting.

I focused my life on everything and everyone else… my purpose, my joy, my value was tied to the feedback I received by giving to others… at home… and at work.

You may think that sounds so wonderful, right? 

“How great is it that you care so much about everyone and everything in your life?!”


I dated the wrong guys for me.

I chose jobs and work environments that were ultimately unhealthy for me.

I distanced myself from family thinking that would create something different in my life.

Then I Had Another Insightful Moment

What if I had this all inside out and backward?

What if I looked at my life, all that is in it, and all that I attracted from the viewpoint of Me Being the Choice Maker… not everyone else? Dr. Dar, L

What if I aligned with my Relationship Language to design my work and home environments?

That’s when my life, work, and relationships changed. Dr. Dar The Relationship Healer

I learned about my Relationship Language. Dr. Dar The Relationship Healer

And I began using it to help me make the best choices for me and my life. Dr. Dar The Relationship Healer

I found the love of my life within 6 weeks of this mental and emotional shift. Dr. Dar The Relationship Healer

My relationships became harmonious and reciprocal.  My family, friends, coworkers, and managers all changed right in front of my eyes… all from me… just changing my mind… and my energy. Dr. Dar The Relationship Healer

Stay with me… it’s hard to believe… I know!  You’ve been taught that you cannot change people. 
I’m living, breathing proof. You can influence and cause people to change. Dr. Dar The Relationship Healer

I attracted fabulous jobs and bosses, created a respectful relationship with my family… and built a thriving coaching business that aligned with my specific Relationship Language. Dr . Dar The Relationship Healer

I stopped making choices that did not align with my

Relationship Language

Since I had figured out how to get out of that dark and lonely cave, I began working with others, helping to guide them forward in their lives using THEIR Relationship Language as their strength… rather than weakness.

I started helping my clients become the Relationship Language oriented chooser in their life so that they too could transform their lives and relationships.

They were so stuck in their analytical… and even critical… mindset, that they could not see their way out. (Been there done that.)

After coaching with me, they started to think in terms of possibilities, options, and dare I say… even their lofty dreams.  They started to see light instead of dark… and then the people and circumstances around them started to change.  My clients have even called me their People Magician! (I’m not sure how I feel about that yet… but it is pretty cool, don’t you think?)

After a short session with me, we unlocked the stronghold their minds had on their heart, shifted the way they saw their situation, alleviated anxiety and toxicity, taught them how to communicate and shifted the tone,  and created a path forward that honored their Relationship Language… they then achieved the results they wanted in their lives and relationships.   They learned how to harness their relationship language in a way that resulted in people changing right in front of their eyes.   

Yes… people can change… and you can influence them by changing your energy… by changing your thoughts, feelings, responses, mood, tone, words and actions.

This my darling is what I want for you too.  Let me show you how! Dr. Dar The Relationship Healer

I’m Dr. Dar, The Relationship Healer


My life’s purpose is to bring light into places where there is no light.  My mission, and my joy is to help you shed the shackles that create struggle in your relationships so that you feel good and become fulfilled in your life, relationships and work, every day!  Because… you’ve come so far, gone through so much, and now, today, it is your turn to shine… to receive from others, feel good, be happy and be successful.

My work with you Metaphysical Life Coach for People Pleasers

I honor and nurture you… your thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and values are sacred to me.  We address your thoughts, feelings, and moods as energetic forms that are not serving your highest good.

(Because it doesn’t feel good to stay there, right?)

You are heard as I listen for the patterns that align with what you want and don’t want in your life and relationships.

We work simply to transcend the old and embrace the inner joyful truth in you.  You experience magical results in a short time.

And from my heart I want you to know:

  • You are not broken or in need of fixing.
  • There are things or happenings in your life that do not feel good… and that does not make you wrong or a terrible person.
  • Designing a life, work, and relationships that feel good by honoring and nurturing your divinely inherent nature and patterns… instead of fighting or shutting them out… is absolutely achievable.
  • I believe you can change people… by honoring yourself, energy, thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and actions… and retraining them on how to be with you, the real you.
  • I believe in the power and energy of love.
  • I believe in feeling good… because when you feel good about yourself, your life, work, and relationships… life is frigging AWESOME!
  • I believe in simple, practical, and applicable approaches to feeling good and creating a life you love.
  • I believe that good things happen in our lives, relationships, and work when we feel good about ourselves.
  • I believe in you.
  • I see you. I honor you. I love you!
Dr. Dar - Feel Good Alchemist
Dr. Dar - Grounding In The Grass
4/6 Mental Projector 9 – Enneagram
Archetype – Magician Ambivert

Clifton Strengths: Maximizer, Relator, Empathy, Connectedness, and Strategic (Learn more about my strengths – I highly recommend you do!)

A bit more about me: Multi-passionate, multi-talented, polymath, multi-year training in life, relationship, business, and personal coaching, calm, honoring, nurturing, caring, and committed to you and your success.


My Approach & Philosophy 

 I believe:

  • In the inherent goodness of humanity
  • We have a relationship with everything in our lives
  • Everything is Energy
  • Everything has a connection
  • In the unseen forces conspiring on your behalf
  • When we feel good about ourselves, everything in our lives falls into the feel-good place, naturally and effortlessly
  • Feeling good is the gateway to Receiving
  • By transforming your energy, you transform your relationships
  • By aligning your energy, you transform your world.

And I Love: 

  • Our beautiful planet, nature, and trees… oh yes, glorious trees
  • Animals (I am a dog gal)
  • Tie-Dye
  • The Moon and Sky
  • Energy and patterns
  • My family
  • Nurturing my nature
  • Reading, quilting, napping, cooking, painting (new passion)
  • Being contribution
  • Feeling good.

In case you want the serious stuff:

Credentials:  Bachelor’s and Masters in Business Administration & Ph.D. in Metaphysics, Philosophy, and Human Behavior.


  • Master Relationship Coach (Singles and Couples) – Relationship Coaching Institute
  • Master Spirit in Business Coach – Spirit in Business Academy
  • Family Coach – The Academy of Family Coaching
  • Life, Change, and Leadership – Coachville
  • Project Management Professional – Project Management Institute
  • Agile Coach and Scrum Master

Student of:
Metaphysics, Living Experience Called Life, Communication, Relationships, Human Energy, Human Behavior, Coaching, Healing, Eastern and Western Astrology, Choice Theory, Astro-Psychology, Depth Psychology, Ontology, Human Design, the Gene Keys, and Creating Our Future from The Present.

See What Clients Say About

Working With Me

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